It’s not evil! Like any vehicle, however, it can get hijacked for doing some pretty evil things. Let us use it for the purposes that serve us, perform regular maintenance, buckle up, stay alert, and drive safely, yes?

How do I do SoMe well already?
–I’m intentional about contacts. Since the outset on Facebook, I only extend and accept ‘friendship’ with folks who are already my friends in real life, or with whom I wish to cultivate real life friendship. Dawn and I became friends on FB, and met in person when she came to Chicago to promote her book, Eat Everything, which I recommend for us all! Heatherf and I met in Shaneiaks, met in August, and plan to gather this month and in April. I met Nicole and Jay/Janet on Ozan’s Inner Circle before he dissolved it. I have yet to meet these friends in person, but we all regularly. The young people don’t use Facebook so now I’m on Insta, connecting with my gym friends–so this is how people lived when I was in residency??
–I post intentionally–most of thet time. I’m getting much better at resisting click bait and vetting sources. I share to provoke thought, love, laughter, and connection.
–I engage respectfully and with purpose. I monitor my own accounts and do not tolerate shitty comments. I avoid complex exchanges that deserve nuance.
–I learn so much! Thanks to Daughter I recognize the voices of Thomas Sanders, Strange Aeons, Miniminuteman, B Dylan Hollis, Cinema Therapy, Dropout, Hank Green, the Try Guys, and Overly Sarcastic Productions. They are all fun and educational, and like Brene Brown, Adam Grant, Simon Sinek and Daniel Pink, these creators know one another and collaborate. History, archeology, STEM, psychology, film making, LGBTQI+ awareness, and random things I never knew–it’s all here!

How could I do it better?
–Limits limits limits. This weekend I realized that I’m afraid to start eyeball reading in case I can’t put the book down and accomplish other tasks (like write my 30 blog posts). And yet (duh-HA!) that’s exactly what happens when I get on those two little apps–‘remind me again in 15 minutes’ is not a deterrent. Working on it, and maybe making progress very recently… Just think of how many more books I could read–that’s motivation!

How is Social Media already good in society?

Connection. When I graduated high school I thought I’d know only a handful of people afterward. Facebook came online between our 10 and 20 year reunions, allowing us to bypass the ‘update’ conversations and enjoy one another so much more deeply since then. Old friends, new friends, family, support and interest groups–the potential for finding and maintaining meaningful tribe and connection bends the mind. I’m so grateful for these possibilities for us all.

Information. See above on learning. When I share something sketchy, I have reliable friends to correct me. I gain exposure to perspectives and literature that I would not otherwise find on my own, such as Brad Stulberg, Gabor Mate, Ryan Holiday, Zachary Zane, and Jacob Knowles. If nothing else, I can see how others use the platforms, which is often extremely instructive.

How could it be better?

Connection. Virtual connection is not necessarily real connection. Meaningful contact over the internet requires acute and specific attention, intention, and reflection. Huh, kinda like interacting in real life, no? I submit that though the format and platform is different, we can still think of and use social media as simply a vehicle of real human relationship. It seems to have similar flaws and pitfalls as any other innately human endeavor attempted at scale… Assuming the algorithms don’t change, how can we, individually and collectively, move toward more mindful and reliably meaningful connection on the socials?

Information. Vet our sources, yes. But what if we don’t trust the conventionally trusted informants? Does this go back to the connection question? Confirmation bias may be simultaneously the most notorious and stealthy hijacker of our rational brains and subsequent interactions, online and then real life conflict turbo jet fueled by emotional click bait of overgeneralized, oversimplified, inflammatory, and embelished sound bites. Yikes. What steering wheel clubs and guardrails can we use here? Or will just tolerate a wasteland of inescapable virtual relational car wrecks all over the place?

*sigh*

So much coincident potential for benefit and risk for harm. GAAAH.
Mindfulness. Agency. What other skills need we to use this impactful tool, rather than be used by it?