Lever Arms, Body Mass, Power, and Leadership

First seen on a social media post by Simon Sinek; please let me know whom to credit!

What makes you an asset to the team? How do you know? How does your leader know?
Does your leader know?

Friend Mark came with me to Ethos last weekend for the last conditioning workout of the block. We pulled the skiers and rowers side by side for 200-300m or 90 seconds, whichever came first, among other movements. No matter how fast I pulled, he still finished at least twenty to thirty seconds before me. Pushing the 215# sleds down and back on the turf, you’d think his weighed almost nothing the way he zipped along, compared to my Sisyphian effort. But I didn’t feel too bad about myself. I’m 5’2″ and 145#; he’s got at least a foot and 60# on me, I’m sure. I marveled briefly at our juxtaposition and just reveled in the fun of having my friend with me in one of my favorite places.

Today, back on the skier and rower, I thought again about our physical differential while pulling, varying my method between leading with legs, back, and arms. I wondered if I’d be an asset or a liability on a rowing team? Is it generally advantageous for rowers to be tall, so they get more distance per pull from their longer lever arms and leg extensions? Could I ever find a rowing method that could compensate for my much shorter limbs? Does my lower body mass give the team any advantage, and if so would it make up for the limb length deficit? How could I maximize my power to contribute? What are the ideal physics of a heterogeneous crew habitus? How could this team win consistently?

It all got me thinking about leadership, naturally.

How do we all contribute from our strengths? How do our leaders identify our strengths and amplify them, then place us in positions of complement and synergy for the good of all?

This requires more attention, thought, intent, creativity, and work than most leaders consider to be their jobs, no? It requires relationship. I must know you to find your true strengths; I must know the whole team to see how we all fit together, where we grind and where we glide. When I do this, you are much more likely to feel seen and valued. I can enlist each person to identify not just their own strengths but one another’s. Proactively synergizing our respective gifts can bond the team in mutual respect and collaboration. My effort, then, is worth the rewards in loyalty and willingness to sacrifice, because we all feel in it together.

Leaders who are willing to do this cultivate cohesive teams who can withstand adversity with confidence and grit. We can call on one another’s superpowers with humility and collegiality, knowing we shine brightest when we all shine together, rather than always trying to outshine one another.

Honesty and transparency stand out as core values here. If I really wanted to row and understood why that would not serve my team, if I were told kindly how I could contribute meaningfully in other ways that also align with my strengths, I’d be much more willing to pivot and still participate fully. That would require my team leader to take time and energy to communicate clearly and completely. I think this is not too much to ask. We should expect it, train it, and hold leaders accountable for it with specific, relevant, and regular feedback.

If the default assumption is that everyone has a worthwhile contribution to make regardless of limb length, body mass or other attribute, and leaders actively help team members identify and amplify their strengths, then that contribution will manifest from each and all of us fully and for the greatest good.
What a wonderful exercise on possibility, no?

Love Notes Wrap Up and an Invitation

Hello Friends!

What a FUN 30 days! It went by so fast, I’m so surprised, and I would definitely do this again! How was it, did you enjoy it? I’d love if you found this month of 12 daily Love Notes both simple and deep, uplifting and grounding at the same time.

I now have a stack of 360 original, unfolded Jar Smile Love Notes that need homes. Would you like some? Here’s my invitation:

Take a look at the thirty themes below.
Which one(s) resonate(s) with you?
Who in your life could use a few of these messages?

I will mail them to you, in an envelope with a stamp and everything!
Let me know if you want them folded or flat.
I can mail internationally, no problem!
Please comment on this post on WordPress, Instagram, or Facebook to request. You can request as many sets as you want, first come, first served. I will send them in whole dozens; no cherry picking. If you only want a few, maybe carry the rest around and strew them in your loving wake?
You can message me your address privately on my Instagram account, @chenger91, or we can figure out something else.

In exchange, please consider making a donation to Braver Angels or Digs With Dignity. These are my two favorite non-profits; they do so much concrete good in our world!
Tell me in your comment how these notes landed for you this month, and how you might pay the feelings forward, either by sharing the notes you request, writing your own, or in some other creative and loving way.

I will take requests through 6:00pm US Central Standard Time Tuesday, December 30th.
I will mark/update the list below as the sets are spoken for.
I think I know what I will do with the leftovers, but wouldn’t it be wonderful if there weren’t any?

The goal here is to spread the Love, my friends–how far can we fling it?
I can’t wait to see!

ADDENDUM: I will strikethrough the sets as they are taken.

1.Transition
2. Rest
3. Work
4. Making Friends
5. Uncertainty
6. Perseverance
7. Balance
8. Revival
9. Lightness
10. Kindness
11. Gratitude
12. Friendship
13. Love
14. Reunion
15. Fitness
16. Remembrance
17. Humanity
18. Learning
19. Bridging Difference
20. Solidarity
21. Dancing
22. Finding Joy
23. Creativity
24. Listening
25. Empathy
26. Patience
27. Homecoming
28. Honesty
29. Change for Good
30. Peace

Typical Smile Jar refill snail mail

Love Notes for Honesty

This one will be a challenge, friends. How does one write love notes about honesty without sounding condescending? Most of these will be self-reflection, I think. So I invite my friends to join in exploration and aspiration. Let’s see what happens!

  1. May we always be honest with ourselves first, even and especially when it’s hard. Then we can be honest with others when it matters.

2. Let us hold ourselves compassionately accountable for our biases, prejudices, assumptions, and stubborn narratives. May we own our shit for all our sakes.

3. Telling the truth can be scary and painful. But let us step up and do it anyway, kindly, directly, humanely. Our future selves will thank one another for our moral fortitude.

4. When I show up honest and open, especially facing your passive aggression, I aim to both honor my integrity and earn your respect. It’s all I can do.

5. May your most honest self always have a strong hand on the wheel of your moral car. May the signals and headlights shine bright so others see your integrity clearly.

6. May you experience many times over the benefits and rewards of honesty more than the risks and costs. The net positives outweigh the negatives if we stick with it!

7. I assume you are an honest person. I know it’s really hard to tell the truth in many situations. I respect you for standing in your honesty however possible. Thank you.

8. Ugh, my biases are strong and steer me to the far lanes of human traffic sometimes. How ’bout you? May we be both firmly and gently honest with ourselves.

9. Let us all always combine honesty with empathy, kindness, and compassion, and deliver our truths from love before anything else. Easier said than done; worth the effort.

10. Even when we are honest (which we too often are not), our truths are still only stories we choose to tell. Even we ourselves must take them with a grain of salt.

11. Yes, always be honest. And attend to context. Not every truth is appropriate for every moment. Choose wisely. Protect relationships with kindness and respect.

12. Thank you (for) being kind and discerning in your honesty. It means so much when you take others’ feelings into account when you offer your truths.

Huh. Are they love notes? Do you feel loved reading them? I hope so. 🙂