Category Archives: Inspiration

Love Notes for Remembrance

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May her memory be a blessing.

Today I attended the funeral and life celebration of Mary Deeley, friend of decades, teacher, preacher, and leader of the Sheil Catholic Center community at my alma mater, Northwestern University. Funny, and I think a little divine, that I wrote notes for reunion two nights ago. Father Ken Simpson celebrated the mass today, and I felt at home, seeing so many familiar faces from decades of relationship. Mary’s spouse spoke with love and humor, just as I imagine Mary would have wanted. It was a whirlwind day of smiles, hugs (so many hugs, it was awesome), and memories. What a lovely reminder for what’s important in life (our relationships) and how to spend the finite time and attention we are given (not much at all, and duh, on relationships).

Let’s see if I can do the feelings justice:

  1. Your memory is indeed a blessing. What a beautiful expression. We miss your bodily presence terribly, and we know you are always with us.

2. When we remember those who have passed, may we honor their legacy of love and impact on us by paying it all forward as best we can. 🙂

3. Long before any of us pass, may we share our fondest remembrances of each other. Why wait until the end? Recall and rejoice today!

4. May we honor and respect past versions of ourselves that had to go. They served us until they didn’t and it’s OK to mourn them and keep living.

5. When I come across something that reminds me of you, I try always to mark it somehow. So the cosmos knows about you and how you still matter.

6. “You know, the death rate from life is 100%.” –My very wise patient. We can choose to create the memories worth recalling by living as intentionally as possible now. In love.

7. If/when I lose my memory, I hope the cosmos will let me keep the love above all else. When I see your face, that’s all I need to remember about us.

8. Let us welcome the memories that bring tears. They signal deep connection and remind us of what we share. They make us human. Welcome welcome welcome.

9. First I thought about grief Then about loss. But remembrance is now my preferred frame. It feels more connecting to the love somehow.

10. When that stab of sudden and intense remembrance strikes, may we slow a step, take a breath, and allow it. It’s transient and a blessing through the ether.

11. They say grief can only live where love has already been. That makes it easier to think about, and no easier to feel through… Still, yeah. Love.

12. Sometimes I remember you as if you have already passed. It’s morbid, I know. But it helps me appreciate you now. It awakens me to us.

Huh. I’m pretty happy with these. Onward, my friends.
And we love you, Mary.

Love Notes for Love

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Bee Butt Friend. I have decided this will be a distinction of love that I confer on anyone who manifests the ethos. And I will continue to strive to do so myself! 😀

The past week has seen me full on binge the Crowns series by Nicola Tyche. US Review of Books apparently calls it, “The political intrigue of Outlander or Game of Thrones with the magic and thrills of A Court of Thorns and Roses.” I’ve texted Friend Phara (who recommended it to me) multiple times a day (sometimes an hour) since starting the first book 8 days ago. Book Two began three days ago and I’m 88% through. I will hold off on Book Three until after the busy upcoming weekend, if I can manage it. Then we will FaceTime to gush about it together, and I will use that and all of my texts as notes for a future blog post/review of this epic, sweeping story.

And because I cannot help myself, and I will positively burst if I don’t output something about it now, tonight’s daily dozen will all be inspired by these extraordinary books. Oh and I highly recommend the audiobooks–Shane does not narrate them, but Katherine Kennard, Connor Brannigan, and Zach Hoffman do a phenomenal job!

My favorite books of 2024 and 2025 so far were Beastly Beauty and Never the Roses, respectively. This series further clarifies what I love most about romantasy, and also likely historical romance. More on that later.

Meanwhile: LOVE LOVE LOVE!!!

  1. OMGosh love makes (us) do CRAZY things! And life would not be nearly as colorful, joyous, meaningful, or deep if it were any other way.

2. However you need to feel loved today, may the people around you deliver in spades. May you feel seen, heard, understood, accepted and FULLY LOVED exactly how you are.

3. When we find ourselves challenged and/or even threatened by others’ words, actions, or ideas, may we 1) find safety, 2) breathe deeply and slowly, 3) withhold judgement, and 4) stand in love first.

4. Is there an experience with more capacity, more depth, more simplicity and complexity than love? I cannot think of any.

5. Rupture. Repair. Repeat. Love mends tears and cracks so the seams are where the art of life (is) strongest. Love on, my friends.

6. Loving is risky, no? “No risk, no reward,” as they say… And loving is its own reward, in a way, also no? Being loved in return is, of course, ideal, but just giving is fulfilling in itself.

7. Phenomenally, our hearts and minds can always accommodate MORE LOVE. It is an infinite resource and its well has no bottom. SMH Cosmic.

8. When you feel overcome with love, what music fills you? I bet it’s crescendo without being loud, sonorous and light yet deep and resonant. ANTHEM-y.

9. It is both vulnerable and brave, I think, to see, acknowledge, and express when someone else in pain needs us, and to go to them in tenderness. These are the moments of true connection. So precious.

10. You know that feeling of total, saturated overwhelm by love? OMG I wish you this ALL THE time! What other energy could possibly be more nourishing?

11. May you(r) love lead you always, ahead of fear, shame, convention, expectations, contempt, anger, indifference, and apathy. Cultivate this as DEFAULT.

12. Love is amazing — It fills and lifts whatever container holds it — However it is required, it shows up and meets the need. It is reliable, versatile, elastic, and renewable. Wow.

Hmmm. Some of these are good, but there is still so much more to capture about Love, isn’t there? I mean DUH. Like twelve little off the cuff notes could cover it. HA! How fun.

Love Notes for Friendship

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How did it take twelve days to come up with this one??
I am surrounded by such amazing people everywhere and I marvel at it every day.
Today was particularly amazing–at the gym, at lunch, over text, and in snail mail.
Our relationships save us, my friends. Let us cultivate them with care and attention.

  1. Age Race Profession Country of origin Religion — Friendship can connect us across all of these boundaries and more, if we let it.

2. From ‘On Friendhip’ — Kahlil Gibran When you part from your friend, you grieve not; for that which you love most in him may be clearer in his absence, as the mountain to the climber is clearer from the plain.

3. Relationships evolve. Friends may come and go, and come back again. We can welcome and roll with it all. We’re all human. We all change. It’s all okay.

4. It’s not gifts, words, or meals shared, necessarily. It’s presence, I think. Intentional attunement, attention, and resonance to energy. Friendship.

5. Dear friends: Find them, be them: Kind – Generous – Fun – Open – Curious – Empathic – Supportive – Nonjudgmental – Loyal – Honest – Present – Accountable.

6. I wish you friends like I have! And that is the best wish I can ever bestow, because I have the BEST f*ing friends EVER!

7. May your people always be at your elbow and your fingertips, not only when you need their support in struggle, but when you celebrate everything good!

8. We all need that one friend who will show up for us no matter what. No questions. No judgments. ‘Move a body friends,’ I think Brene Brown calls them. Hell yes.

9. Bee butts. Eileen sends me photos when she sees them because she knows how much I love them. May you have at least one bee butt friend.

10. I knoe you’re my friend because you are honest. I know you are honest because you tell me hard truths. And you do it kindly. Like I said, you’re my friend.

11. This is exciting! We just never know when, where, or how we will meet our next great friend! It could be anywhere, anytime! AnyONE! How AWESOME is that!?

12. I think we all need more collage frames to display all of those silly candid photos of friends being silly and joyful together, just being themselves.

144 of 360 completed, friends! And I think this daily dozen project is going well so far! I’m still having fun, and my process efficiency improves by the day. The notes are stacking up, though. Still contemplating what I will do with them all after the month ends! Ideas are welcome! More tomorrow!