Who’s Your Team?

November Gratitude Shorts, Day 17

As I lay on the table in physical therapy today I thought, how fortunate I am to have healthcare insurance that allows me to come every week and get help for my pain and dysfunction. I always leave feeling better, and my therapist knows exactly what’s going on and what to do.

I also have an incredible trainer. She has a sixth sense for my mood and readiness for challenge each session. She is also a lifelong learner, and seeks new knowledge from reading and conferences, among other things. When I share assessments between these two dedicated providers, they each integrate the other’s recommendations and the results are synergistic.

My primary care doctor has ‘the three A’s’ that matter most to us patients, in order: Availability, Affability, and Ability. He also cares for my children, and manages their hypervigilant internist mom with kindness and patience.

My therapist is a Godsend. I don’t have depression or anxiety, nor psychosis or a personality disorder, that I know of.  But I have my share of emotional baggage, and having an objective professional to help me sort and process has proven invaluable in all aspects of my life. Long-established thought, feeling, and behavior patterns show up repeatedly, wearing slightly different outfits each visit. Through therapy I have learned to recognize the party crashers more easily, and manage them better over time.  Sometimes they are allowed to stay, and I make sure they know the rules. Other times they get thrown out, again.  Therapy helps me keep my inner house in order, so that I may welcome and integrate new knowledge and wisdom.

But my team includes more than just my healthcare providers. I have a strong cadre of close friends upon whom I can call at any time, and who will answer always with love and understanding. I recently had a sudden personal dilemma that caused me considerable angst. I emailed a few of these friends and each of them responded immediately with exactly the wisdom I needed… Not necessarily what I wanted, but that’s what true friends do–they tell you the truth with kindness, compassion, and unconditional love.

I also count my parents, sisters, husband, children, neighbors, some colleagues, and many others, as team members. The NFL comes to mind… Choose your team–each is comprised of literally hundreds of people, all working for the shared purpose of making the team, as a whole, the best it can be.

I cannot think of how my team could possibly be better.  And it’s not just about me. I am a member of each other person’s team, too. We all hold each other up.

An idea came to me in conversation this past weekend, when I spoke to a fellow internist about physician burnout and patient satisfaction: We cannot separate my well-being from your well-being, if we are in relationship. And we are all in relationship. So let us take care of one another.

Rest

November Gratitude Shorts, Day 16

Grateful for a break once in a while. Volleyball cancelled tonight so I may rest an injured hand. Three weeks until the next conference, a chance to take a breath, integrate the learning, and be with the family.  No pending deadlines (other than a blog post per day).  Caught up at work.  Projects on autopilot for now. Looking forward to the holiday slow down, and will try to avoid the holiday rush…

Wishing you all some peace and rest, also. 

Not perfect. But great.

Friends, I meant to reblog this weeks ago, and it slipped out of my consciousness! I have no interests in Rian’s coaching business, other than I think she is doing great work and contributing positively to the world. Take a look!

Rian Kerfoot's avatarTruth and Cake

Not perfect. But great.

Today I had a wake-up call in my long journey in recovering from perfectionism:

Not showing up is such a waste.

A little backstory: I started my journey as a coach a little over two years ago. In that time, I’ve done a huge amount of self-exploration, growth and healing work and I’ve facilitated a lot of growth for others. My feedback has been consistently amazing. When I say I’m good at what I do, it’s not bragging. It’s simple truth. Truth that’s taken me a long time to wrap my heart and soul around. Truth my ego’s had a field day with: stay small, who are you to shine like that? Downplay, downplay, downplay.

But the thing is, we can’t really help people when we’re exerting so much energy to downplay our gifts.

I’ve been working (with my amazing design partner-in-crime) on creating a website for the past year…

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