Category Archives: culture

Ode to Teachers

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NaBloPoMo 2020 – Today’s Lesson

How is Son?  Who is Son?  What can I tell you about Son?

Zoom parent teacher conferences are the bomb!!  From the comfort of my own office chair, I met with four of Son’s teachers today and had the most efficient yet meaningful conversations in recent memory. No driving around campus looking for parking, forgetting my school ID in the car, and rushing through the maze of hallways trying to find the right classrooms.  And the teachers, OMG, God bless ‘em. 

They moved everything online back in the spring—heroic.   All summer they prepared for at least three separate and equally challenging contingencies for fall, and at least one department completely reinvented the entire year’s curriculum (all hail PE teachers!).  On Back to School Night I could practically palpate the passion and love for their calling, even in two dimensions and from afar.  I jumped at the chance to talk to them again.

German Teacher assigned literature on coping with change, encouraging students to develop a habit of self-reflection and -regulation through adversity—in a second language—a compound life practice in flexibility.  English Teacher cheers thoughtful dissent and cogent argument.  And Physics Professor and I chatted for 30 minutes on everything from Son’s kinetic tendencies to food as medicine, to intrinsic and extrinsic drivers of longevity, to herd immunity manifestos and how to interpret them. 

Teachers yearn to know their students personally.  Their primary objective and source of fulfillment is the growth and development of young minds toward an infinite future of creativity and independence.  Their enthusiasm is infectious, their feedback to parents invaluable.  Gratitude for all teachers, mine included, moved me deeply today.  May we lift this profound appreciation every day, and uphold all educators accordingly.

My Best Friends

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NaBloPoMo 2020 – Today’s Lesson

What draws you to your favorite people? 

For me it’s presence, openness, conviction, kindness, honesty, constancy, and most importantly, curiosity.  My best friends hold me up and hold me accountable.  They ask open, honest questions, and they really listen.  They see, hear, understand, accept, and love me.  They make joyful effort to meet me in my struggles to observe, understand, and integrate my experiences—to learn.  They keep me honest, never letting me get away with small-minded BS.  And they are all master learners themselves.

Lately I notice people, mostly men, who speak in declaration, refutation, and rhetoric.  They rarely ask questions that aren’t leading, dismissing, or prelude to soliloquy.  They interrupt incessantly.  I used to suffer greatly from encounters with such haute-pedants, from the utter unilaterality of conversation.   If they listened at all, it was to argue rather than to understand or broaden perspective.  Exhausting.  Today I moderate my expectations in such exchanges.  I accept what is, let go my wishes to be understood.  I focus instead on understanding, and my learning burgeons—often as much about myself as anything or anyone else.  My best friends point me to this higher plain of attention.

Tonight I see my tribe as a small, über-productive beehive.  Every day we sisters (and some brothers) survey our vast and diverse environment for new nectar.  It can be dangerous out there, but we’re tough and make it home.  As one dances out the journey, others attend and minister with love.  Together, we take everybody’s learning and make the sweetest honey, the insights and wisdom that nourish and sustain us—that drive us onward, seeking ever farther, wider, and higher meaning and purpose. 

How does your hive make you better?

Credentials and Credibility

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NaBloPoMo 2020 – Today’s Lesson

Who do you trust?  Why? 

Margo and I were friends.  So when she recommended Christine as a life coach, I trusted enough to make the call.  I had no idea what a life coach was; “CPCC” was meaningless to me.  But after the intake call, her credibility and expertise were well-established, and she has been my coach ever since.  That was 2005.

I spent $900 and a weekend on Zoom last month for Ozan Varol’s Moonshot Academy.  I trusted in the value of the experience based on my interaction with Ozan’s Inner Circle to date—for two days I would give and receive peer coaching in a creative and challenging environment.  And bonus, I met Andrew, Kes, and Nicole.  Each of us aims to learn, share, expand our horizons, and do more good, hallelujah!

Kes’s last blog post goaded me to differentiate between credentials and credibility—my own and others’ alike.  Do I deserve your trust in clinic just by virtue of my MD?  What about when I speak and write on communication and leadership?  Why should you trust me?  Why should I trust you?

What are credentials?  My list includes education, work/life experience, recommendations/references, and body of work (eg peer reviewed publications). 

What establishes credibility?  My list: Attitude (humility, honesty, curiosity, reciprocity); consistency and integrity; purpose; quality of relationships (and thus references).  Christine’s credentials are solid.  Like any good professional she expands her expertise with continuous study.  But her credibility stems from her honesty and integrity—who she is.  It’s why I refer patients and friends.  Their feedback glows, and Christine’s credibility expands.

So perhaps credentials are superficial—what we’ve done, what’s immediately visible…  And credibility is deep—who we are, what we’re about.  I know which is more important to me.