Category Archives: gratitude

Continuity

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I know you.

It has taken time.
Our initial meeting may or may not have facilitated it.
You may or may not have made it easy.
I persisted.
And now we have been through things together.
It has been well worth the effort and energy.

You know me.
This is easy, as I wear my heart on my sleeve–always have.
It doesn’t take much to know me; but I don’t let just anybody in.
I give the benefit of the doubt; I also trust my protective instincts.

Time.
There is no substitute.
And it’s not enough.
Knowing requires engagement, intentional and volitional.
Time helps, providing opportunity, enabling continuity.

With enough time and encounters, knowing emerges organically.
Over years and decades it becomes intuitive, if we pay attention.

I see you. I think of you when I see things you like.
I hear you–not just when you speak, but when you cross my mind.
I anticipate your words and expressions in response to ideas and opinions.
I know you.

Knowing and feeling known nourish us.
No matter the context.
We are wired to connect–to one another, our fellow humans.
Meeting over and again, small and big moments alike, each building on the last.
Memories accumulating, recollections shared.

Life unfolds.
We are who we are at our core, and continue to be so.
We also learn, grow, and evolve.
Change and stay the same.
Those who know us see no contradiction here.
Rather, known in our wholeness over time, in continuity, we all make sense.

This season, may we reflect on and consider how we know and are known.
May we find the courage and resolution to express and connect in depth and meaning.
May we practice openness, curiosity, non-judgment, and acceptance more than other things.
May our relationships strengthen and tighten in the best ways.

In this life, our relationships save us.
Continuity of connection, if we have the fortune, is a priceless gift.
Let us not take it for granted.

Bit Post: Squishy and Strong

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Last week’s last set: 10 reps, 130#

4 x 10: 95-125-135-145#
(last set actually x 11)

I PR’d my trap bar deadlift today, woohooooooo!! I can now reliably lift at least my own body weight, and it was not that hard!

I knew it was possible so I asked my friends to take a video– Thanks, Elle! The last PR was some weeks ago, 135#, 6 reps; I remember it feeling moderately difficult but not impossible, so I looked forward to this block to advance the weight. Today, in the third and final week of this program, I was confident. And I killed it, if I do say so myself (I even got in one extra rep at the end, having lost count and wanting to make sure I did all ten)! I feel strong!

The day unfolded one task after another, and I only saw the video hours later.
First thought: Look at all those cutaneous fat rolls, eew! Gymwear does not necessarily flatter the perimenopausal body, I say–especially when it was purchased a decade before said menopause began, HA!

But you know what? I’m okay with it. I have pulled and pushed more weight the past week–the past 20 months, actually–than I have in my entire life. I have made remarkable progress and learned so much about my body. I’ve had pain (my body ‘talking to me’, as Jacob says) in my left glute, right forearm, left knee, low back, and right shoulder. I can always modify a movement to protect a vulnerable spot while still strengthening it, thanks to my amazing coaches. Now I need to work on grip strength (hello dead hang, omg) so I can keep loading for more weight and reps, woohooooooooo!

So really, who cares if I’m a little squishy on the outside? I carry it well.

I am well on my way to being a Strong Old Lady. I feel great body, mind, and spirit, and that’s what matters. And I can shop for more flattering clothes if I want.

To my fellow old-ish ladies: Keep pushing. Find your people. Let your body surprise you with its capacity and resilience. Have fun!

Life is short and we are here to cheer one another on!

Squishy and Strong, my friends. It’s all good.

Celebrate the Wins

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53# kettle bell, 15 swings, 2 rounds (after one round at 44#), as part of the Ethos HIIT circuit this morning. It’s the heaviest kettle bell swinging I’ve ever done in this setting, woohooooooo!

Got to spend quality time with Son yesterday. Watched two movies together: “My Spy: The Eternal City,” which is the sequel to “My Spy,” which we watched during our 2020 pandemic summer trip, and “Ride On,” a heartwarming father-daughter reunion film starring Jackie Chan and spoken all in Mandarin (highly recommend!).

This post makes 32 in 32 days, my longest blogging streak ever, and #663 total. When I started I thought I’d be happy if I lasted a year. Win.

It occurs to me that four weeks on from the election, political and interpersonal tension may have eased a bit? Possibly the holidays have an abating effect? Another thing to be thankful for, yes? And now I have multiple notes to self, all linked in last night’s post, for when I feel the agitation coming back on–29 anticipatory admonishments to walk my talk.
Once again I’m humbled to realize that I take for granted how easy it is to be open and curious in some contexts. I also too often fail to realize how exponentially harder it is in others–and that is when I fail. But that is why I train–so I may execute more easily and effectively exactly then. This weekend I managed to do better than before–WIN!

Finally finished What Is Health? by Peter Sterling, referenced in Master of Change by Brad Stulberg. What a dense and intense review of basic science and human physiology (basically the first two years of med school), and then the most validating exposition on how it’s our systems that make us sick far more than our individual failings. Listening to the acknowledgements has pointed me to Guns, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond, currently restimulating my non-fiction brain with authority! I wonder if I can muster the attention and focus to finish The Fourth Turning by Strauss & Howe before year’s end? That would be such a win! And I look forward to many more exciting non-fictions in the queue: I Never Thought of It That Way by Monica Guzman, The Amen Effect by Sharon Brous, Possible by William Ury, and Trust by Pete Buttigieg, among others!

Tonight I get to write snail mail, journal, and prepare for a new workweek renewed and refreshed from a lovely long weekend connecting with people who make my life better. So much to look forward to this month, my friends. Now I’m going to light the Christmas tree, make myself a hot beverage, and settle into more words.
It doesn’t get much better than this.