Tag Archives: Ethos Training Systems Chicago

Inclusive Leadership

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Crystal, Eric, Dwight, Tim, Cory, Arianna, Kasey, and Molly.
Ethos leaders lifted with the rest of us today.

Seven Ethos coaches, clinicians, and owners took the 11:00am total body strength class with us civilians today. It changed the vibe altogether. They’re just like the rest of us (but they lift heavier weight); they are human. They believe in their work and mission to make us healthier. They walk the talk. They motivate me to keep going.

Last week I attended a creativity gathering where the facilitator disclosed personal stories as he reflected our own disclosures back to us. He made it safe for us to be open, to explore the origins of our passion with the group. He was one of us, even as he led us from the front.

From the internet; anyone know the original source?

Consider leaders whom you trust, who make it safe to admit mistakes, give honest feedback, and present constructive criticism to make the team better. What qualities do they embody to create a culture where we can each and all flourish? I have some ideas:

Walk the Talk

Lead by example. If I’m asking you to tell the truth, I had better do it first. If I’m asking you to be curious, open minded, non-judgmental, and a team player, how can I expect it of you if I don’t model it as your leader? We all know lip service when we hear it. Even if I struggle with the skills I aim to model, seeing me put forth the effort signals my integrity. We respect and follow leaders who exhibit humility and grit.

Get On the Ground

I try never to ask anything of a team member that I would not be willing to do myself in their place. We don’t trust leaders who separate themselves from those they lead by keeping their hands clear and clean from the dirty work on the ground, directing from far and on high. Disconnected leaders more likely lack empathy and understanding; they may be less likely to consider the real and direct impact of their decisions on others. You cannot know me until you meet me in my context. You can lead me more effectively if you know me. So get down here with me, see what I see. Feel it with me.

Be Present, Check In

While pulling the rope of mission onward, with the team, from the front, we leaders can really be with the people pulling with us, at our direction. We can observe their dynamics, feel the vibration on the ground. What’s going on in their lives outside of this pulling? How are they affected by the nested environments of organization, profession, and geopolitical tumult? When we ask these questions we must be fully present, honestly curious. People can tell when we’re not listening and don’t really care. It doesn’t take much to engender or erode trust and camaraderie; and it’s a significant act/practice of self-regulation, to turn off our inner diaglogue and attune fully to the person in front of us, on their terms. The rewards of making this connection, regularly and repeatedly, are priceless and lasting.

Ask More Before Directing

Leaders must problem solve. How many relevant questions do our leaders ask, and how well do they understand the full scope and complexities of the problems, before they start commanding and controlling? I observe not many. The best leaders ask the most open and honest questions. Their curiosity is genuine; their problem solving starts with query and connection before bias and assumption. Good questions answered honestly inevitably lead to more questions; insights emerge and the best solutions arise from clarity and comprehension of the whole, interconnected picture.

Own Your Shit

Accountability of leadership is key for organizational effectiveness, and everywhere I see it lacking. Leaders are human just like the rest of us. They make mistakes. They juggle competing interests and navigate complex environments of personnel, finances, and public relations, among others. The moment they dismiss, deflect, blame, or whine, our trust frays. We don’t need martyrs. We just need leaders who can look us in the eye and say, “I fucked up. Here is how I will make it right.”

What else? What kind of leadership are you experiencing, admiring, tolerating, and bemoaning today? How can we each be better leaders from any chair in our orchestras, to make a useful contribution?

It completely slipped my mind to post here last night! I was too excited for the end of my workweek and felt compelled to write jar smiles, as it had been a few days. It’s like a mild addiction, writing those little love notes. Happy Friday, friends.

Breathing Through It

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From my Insta tonight (@chenger91):

Happy Weekend, friends!

Wishing us all an energetic balance of rest, fun, productivity, and connection. All I want to do is write jar smiles!! 🤪🥰😂

Thanks to Coach Eric and (guru) Pierre at Ethos who led the elite human performance class today—I didn’t die, YAY HOOEY!! 😁

Our current government sows chaos in practically every domain of socioeconomic systems, and the fallout may take years to realize. Morbidity and mortality could be staggering. And yet, here we are. We stepped into it together and we’ gotta figure out together how to get out. It will take all of us doing differently from what we have done to date—I think we have proven much of that isn’t working, yes? 🤨🙄

This is an opportunity. We get to re-invent and co-create. Unlike those in charge now, we can ‘A5R it’—take a thoughtful, critical, and wise look at things, keep what’s working well and revise the rest. All good change requires iteration. It’s an infinite game. We start by bringing our best, most creative and compassionate selves to the front. Easier said than done in distress. So we do what we can.

Like Pierre taught us today:
1. Control our breath, and expand laterally.
2. Focus on microgoals (like the next breath).
3. Speak positively to ourselves (AND ONE ANOTHER!).
4. Envision the successful future.

It’s not rocket science. But it is humanity, so it’s messy. Still, we’ got this. 👊🏼👍🏼💪🏼👏🏼

@eric.koetting
@debarpierre
@ethostrainingchi

ODOMOBaaT: One Day, One Moment, One Breath at a Time.

The Insta post included the photos below, all notes written for friends in distress.
We could all do a better job recognizing, validating, empathizing with, and exploring one another’s distress, no matter what the geopolitical circumstances and environment. Most people don’t lash out for no reason. We have all spent too long ignoring others’ distress. This has to change.

Self-Efficacy, Ethos Session 1

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Ya kinda had to be there, my friends.

And it was all my friends who came to my first ever wellness presentation at Ethos today. For two easy and loving hours ten of us engaged in openness, curiosity, reflection, thought, and connection. After outlining the general themes and objectives of my past wellness presentations, General Manager Elena landed on ‘self-efficacy’ as the all-encompassing concept when we discussed our plans earlier this year. It felt immediately right. This was to be the first of four sessions throughout the year.

Self-efficacy: “an individual’s belief in their capacity to act in the ways necessary to reach specific goals.” (Bandura, 1977, 1986, 1997)

I have presented to academic surgeons on national stages and judges of the Federal Circuit Courts. Still, speaking to the Ethos community made me a little nervous. There would be fitness experts in the audience–what could I ‘teach’ them on the topic of exercise? This was a new and potentially very diverse group; one that did not necessarily know my credentials or professional expertise. My highest goal was for all of us to leave the session feeling inspired, empowered, connected, and thought-provoked. My intent was not to simply lecture or convey, rather to offer, invite, and receive in fluid exchange and mutual engagement. I had to give msyelf pep talks all week, calling forth my confidence in attuning, listening, asking good questions, reflecting, paraphrasing, as well as presenting.

What a real-time practice in self-efficacy, no? Walk the Talk, Chenger!

Dry erase before: “Of health and wellness: Domains, Practices, Attributes”

I planned today to introduce my ‘5-3-5’ framework of health: 5 domains, 3 core practices, and 5 atrributes. It’s a work in progress, which makes it a fun and high-potential foundation for discussion with any audience. After sharing our respective thoughts and experiences of self-efficacy, we explored how it applies in health and wellness.

“What are important domains of health?” I have written about ‘the five domains of health’–sleep, exercise, nutrition, stress management, and relationships–on patient action plans and this blog for many years. It’s relevant, reliable, and comprehensive for the purposes of an annual physical exam. But I wanted to learn from this audience how they see ‘domains of health’ in life as we live it. The brainstorm and discussion that ensued showed us all how layers of complexity and interconnected relationships at both individual and collective levels impact our experiences of both health and un-health.

Self-awareness, self-regulation, and effective communication: in my mind, these are the three core life practices that help us assess, adjust, and adapt to whatever life brings. The group’s suggestions of key health practices, we could argue, could all fit under one or more of the three. And it also emerged today that there may be a missing element of movement–that to be healthy we must not only attune inwardly, but act–we must both be and do–or not–there’s something here about intention and volition, about agency, I think. I invited. My friends offered. We noodled, played, exchanged, and documented. And now I have so much more to mush around with, to dig into and mine for treasures!

“When I am healthy, I feel…”

By now folks had caught on. I ask the open-ended question, record the responses, and when one of my own words comes up, I write it under the heading. Brother-in-law Kinnier compared the process to playing Family Feud and we all laughed. When I think of how I want us to feel in health–in body, mind, spirit, work, and relationship–these five words top my list today: Stable. Strong. Flexible. Agile. Resilient. The words my friends offered in this section represent sensations, emotions, and states of being, among other things. What words would you add? How besides words would you express/explain what it means to you to be healthy?

When I look at the ‘after’ state of the board (I did not take a picture of the whole due to glare, but I wish now that I had), I feel so gratified. I successfully offered my framework for health, developed organically and in collaboration with patients, colleagues, friends, and fellow life journeyers over decades of medical practice and living. We agreed at the end that next time we can include non-verbal expressions such as emojis, diagrams, symbols, and pictograms, to further deepen our exchange and discourse on these ideas.

*sigh*

The openness, curiosity, safety, warmth, connection, and love I felt today, friends. Ohmygoodness. I had to encourage myself in advance, reassure myself that I had what was needed to lead a discussion, to facilitate this opening, and invite and allow all of our wisdom to emerge and mingle. The energy in the Den vibrated today. It had a temperature, a depth. We all both contributed and benefited (I think), offered and received. The outcome felt elevated and synergistic–immensely greater than the sum of its individual parts.

This presentation series is part of my project to broaden my reach, to expand my contribution in health and wellness to more audiences, and to facilitate engagement, empowerment, and agency for individuals and organizations. Elena and I had orginally planned four quarterly sessions this year. Today’s session lasted thirty minutes longer than scheduled, and many of us wanted to keep the energy flowing, to continue the conversation sooner than three months from now, as we looked at the ‘after’ state of the board and saw so much possibility for future conversations!

YES. THIS. This is what I live for, my friends!

I write this summary so those who could not attend today might get a feel for what it was like. But I could only capture here a fraction of just my own experience. There is just something about a gathering, an intentional meeting when and where we choose to spend (give?) our time, energy, and resources together in service of lifting ourselves and one another.

There are simply not enough words to express my gratitude and appreciation for my friends who showed up today. Their unwavering presence and love made it safe for me to be BOOBS OUT, all me, all in, open and honest, curious and confident. We agreed today to all go home and let it sink in, to saturate in the connection, and see/feel what emerges that calls us to gather and commune around next time.

I. cannot. wait. Hope to see you there!