Be Respectful

NaBloPoMo 2021:  Do Good, Kid

I can just see every writing teacher cringing to see ‘Be’ as my verb in this action mantra.

I just cannot think of a better way to express this fundamental admonition.  It’s like the cheer we all know from high school—instead of ‘aggressive’, it’s, “R.  E-S.  P-E-C-T-F-U-L.  Be. Respectful.  B-E Respectful!”  Ha, the two words even have the same number of letters so the rhythm transposes perfectly.  Hmmm, maybe we can start a movement from the sidelines here.

In the grocery check-out line.  At the Target returns desk.  On the phone with customer service.  Driving.  With your in-laws, your coworkers, your spouse, your children, your direct reports, the building custodian. With your kids’ teachers.  With elected officials.  With people who disagree with you on issues that matter deeply to you.  With the person aggressively disrespecting you to your face.  With the authoritarian police officer using excessive force, the boss acting out of sheer prejudice, even malice.  With the militant supremacist throwing rocks and spitting at you.

Why be respectful? Because it’s the best way to show that you see the other person as also human, equal in worth to yourself, even if they don’t feel or think the same about you. They may say they do—don’t we all say it? It’s not socially acceptable to say out loud that we think someone is beneath us—at least not in public, or ‘polite society.’ Is there actually even such a thing anymore, polite society? Every year it seems easier for people to demean one another out loud, viciously, violently, in public, with no politeness whatsoever, and no consequences. I think every one of us needs to query ourselves truthfully about how much we really value and believe in equality, and get honest about where we don’t: Own it. Stand up and accountable for it.

But if we are sincerely convinced that we see all humans as equally valuable, that we harbor no occult supremacist ideals, then the least we can do is be respectful toward one another in all of our interactions. It may even serve as a prophylactic, keeping us from speaking or acting on our latent negative biases, if we simply commit to practicing respectfulness.

Disrespect is the first arrogant step down the slippery slope of dehumanization, and that descent leads straight to relationship hell.

Rest

NaBloPoMo 2021:  Do Good, Kid

Sometimes it’s just too much.

Perhaps you are familiar with the involuntary shut down?  Physical, mental, functional—the body knows what we need, even if the mind flouts it.  The body usually wins—it puts us down despite our resistance, denial, hubris, masochism, or whatever.  If we’re lucky, nothing that bad happens—we crash for a day or so, sleep, lounge, mope, release.  The family, office, social circles get along without us for a little while.  Then, recharged and refreshed (at least partially), we’re back at it, careening on the path toward burnout yet again.  When will we learn to pace ourselves?  To build in rest and recovery to our hamster wheel life?  If we thought of ourselves as elite athletes, whose utmost well-being are valued so highly, how would we treat ourselves differently and better?

The brain, which constitutes 2% of body weight, accounts for 20% of our daily energy expenditure…. So this exhaustion I feel, how much is of body, and how much of mind? Why does it matter, when they are so inextricably interdependent? How fascinating, this sensation of mental exhaustion, which manifests bodily in no uncertain terms, and yet is fully distinguishable from its physical counterpart—or is it? I feel the somatic deceleration first, then look up wearily and sense the mental blackout approaching on the horizon, a fuzzy dark cloud. I invited it by staying up too late and accepting too many invitations; by challenging myself with too many curious, fascinating! amazing! projects. It’s a recurring pattern I have yet to break, or at least balance a lot better–duh-HA! [cue cosmic laughter]

No wonder I seem to write about it repeatedly in November, though this year I’m getting to it earlier in the month than in 2016 and 2019 (see links above), teeheeee… Not sure if that’s a reassuring and/or ominous sign? I keep hearing something telling me right now, get off the computer, OMG get to bed, SLEEP! It’s like an incessant earworm… “If it’s important, it will be repeated,” they told us in medical school. Blahahaaaa (okay now I’m getting slap happy)…

So I will listen, finally, and sign off tonight with a slackish post.  Tomorrow and every day coming is another chance to practice making healthier choices.  I’ got the exercise thing down; my eating is definitely coming around.  Woohoooo, progress!  But sleep, GRRRRR.  …I’ll get there.  Maybe we can only slay one dragon at a time, after all… but not if we’re sleep deprived!

Root Down to Branch Out

NaBloPoMo 2021:  Do Good, Kid

From the moment you hit the earth

A seed of life

It starts

Maybe ground here is too hard

Too dry

No entry point

Wind blows you about until finally

An open cranny

You nestle in

Soil here is soft, rich

Rains often enough

That you soften too

Open up

Extend tender sprouts

Seeking affirmation, encouragement, stability, welcome

Warm earth says yes, stay here

I’ got you

Settle down 

You’re home

Tiny stem, thin stalk, stiff sapling 

Stretching skyward

With absolute adolescent audacity

Limbs thicken along with trunk

Leaves face, unfurl, seize

Golden rays of nourishing light

Stretching ever higher, as if to lift

Off from the place

That took you in

At your most vulnerable

Hopes, dreams, aspirations—

Learning, budding, reaching

Grow, grow, grow!

Seasons cycle

Gentle, severe

Abundant, austere

Nurturing, injurious

Ad infinitum 

As you spread up and out

In bold, ascendant expansion

Deep rhizomes drill

Down and out

Far and wide

Securing your communion

With all that is rooted

An underground network

Sensing you

Always giving

Your foundation

Holding you up 

Through it all

Grounding fortifies you

That you may strive faster, higher, stronger

Sturdy, anchored stability

Supple, limber mobility

In dynamic balance

Life of healthy growth

Evolution in action

One mitosis at a time

Ad infinitum