Category Archives: NaBloPoMo

On What Helps

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NaBloPoMo 2016, Letters to Patients, Day 22

To Patients Preparing for Uncomfortable Holidays:

Seek what helps.

What did I write recently about staying off of Facebook and minimizing my social media exchanges?  How fascinating, look what I just did—spent the last two hours on Facebook!  I also write about trying, falling down, and trying again…  So this is me both falling down (in my attempt to stay off) and trying again (to engage meaningfully).

The holidays are coming, yay!  …And, not so yay!  The conversations we have with friends and family in the next 6 weeks or so have enormous potential—for division as well as connection.  Personally, I feel optimistic.  I plan to evoke my core values of open-mindedness, empathy, and integrity.  I want to look back on the gatherings with gratitude and deeper connection.  So today I share with you all the things I have read (today—see?  I endure Facebook for your benefit! teeheehee) that have helped me.  These pieces validate, challenge, reassure, alarm, question and motivate me to Hold the Space, Stay on the Path, and Seek Love.  Please share yours, also!

A fellow physician’s acknowledgement of the humanness of bias, its potential for harm in caring for patients, and a reminder for self-awareness and –management.

Posts by Michelle at The Green Study, reminding us that internal conflict is normal in the face of world events such as ours, with concrete suggestions for actions that align with core values:  “We cannot strengthen our character unless it is tested. We cannot defend our freedoms unless they are threatened. We cannot become better writers or artists or humans unless we have obstacles to overcome.”

An article from The Guardian that points me to reputable sources of alternate points of view, so I may understand better.

A call out from the Wall Street Journal—to help me own my shit before I call out others on theirs.

A gentle message from fellow blogger John Pavlovitz: “Friend, however you choose to navigate these holidays, know that it’s the right way. Give yourself permission to pretend or confront or abstain as you need to, and forgive yourself later if you decide you chose poorly. You’re probably going to get it wrong or at least feel like you did.

“But remember too, to save a little of that mercy for those who sit across the table from you or those who choose not to. They’ll be doing the best they can too.”

And finally, the Prayer of Maimonides, the twelfth century physician and philosopher:

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These holidays, wish me persistence and ‘stubborn gladness,’ as Liz Gilbert calls it.  I wish you all the same!

On Trudging the Road Forward

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img_4456NaBloPoMo 2016, Letters to Patients, Day 21

To Patients Who Doubt Your Ability or Endurance:

Don’t give up!  Stay on the path!!

Holy COW, Day 21!!  That’s three whole weeks that I have managed to post every single day!  So it really is true, the more times you try, the more likely you are to succeed.

I tried NaBloPoMo last year with “November Gratitude Shorts.”  It felt scary at first, then stressful, then deflating.  Then this past April, I did my first A to Z Blogging Challenge.  I had the insight to warn my family that I would be busier, and then halfway through announced that I would basically stop cooking until it was over.  It was not nearly the slog of NGS, but I did feel quite overextended and anxious for many days that month.  I submitted the last one with 30 minutes to spare on April 30.

The evolution here is worth examining, as it parallels other endeavors in life—exercise, parenting, the cultivation of other relationships… When I counsel patients around health behavior change, I often hear, ‘I tried that before, it didn’t work.’  This is usually when I point out that ‘before’ was a very different time.  Then they concede that since then, their experience, circumstances, and priorities may have evolved, sometimes drastically so, and maybe ‘it’ might work this time, who knows?

If we live consciously, observantly, and mindfully, I believe that all of our experiences make us stronger.  Trials and learnings in one realm of life inevitably pertain to all others.  If we can manage to see and appreciate this, then the potential for application and personal growth expands exponentially.  How much more could we accomplish if we just allowed ourselves to pick up and keep going, not only expecting to fall along the way, but anticipating it with gladness for the learning?

So let’s lighten up on ourselves, shall we?  Even if you have tried many times to quit smoking, establish an exercise routine, ‘eat healthier’ (whatever that means for you), and then consistently gone back to old habits, don’t give up!  Stay on the path!  Keep moving forward!  Try something new, learn something new, integrate, and continue!  Life is so much more fun when we don’t take it all so seriously, no?

So now that I have bragged on Day 21, what do you bet things will fall apart as we approach the Thanksgiving weekend?  Oh well, we shall see!  Even if that’s the case, I already have some valuable lessons stashed away:

  1. Try not so schedule so many conferences and presentations during NaBloPoMo.
  2. 500 words and 60 minutes are very reasonable limits for daily posts.
  3. Definitely warn the family; set expectations in advance.
  4. Protect the sleep!!

Happy Monday, all—and here’s to trudging the path together!

On Expanding Our Potential

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10-growth-mindset-thought-conversionsNaBloPoMo 2016, Letters to Patients, Day 20

To Patients Whose Identity is Fixed:

Why not adopt a Growth Mindset?

Have you already read Carol Dweck’s book Mindset?  I first learned about the premise of a growth mindset several years ago, in the context of parenting.  Basically we should praise kids’ efforts more than their attributes: “Way to keep at it!” instead of “Wow, you’re so smart!”  When I think of myself primarily as ‘smart,’ I am less likely to try new things or take risks, for fear of appearing ‘not smart’ and ruining my reputation, or worse, my self-image.  That is what Dweck calls a ‘fixed mindset.’  A growth mindset, in contrast, allows room for experimentation and, well, growth.  I could still think of myself as ‘smart,’ but it means something different—rather than all-knowing, I am smart because I am an avid and effective learner.

Now I see it in broader terms, and it applies to people of all ages, in all phases of life.

From now into January, I have committed to moderate a weekly board review webinar on infectious disease (‘ID’).  I review questions, prepare a slide deck with explanations of correct and incorrect answers, and go online Tuesday nights with a partner to teach fellow practicing internists.  I really enjoy the webinars, but the topics sometimes not so much.  My fixed mindset at the outset this time: “I hate ID.”  Last week’s slide prep session may have been the longest two hours in recent memory.  I answered 6 of 8 questions wrong.  “I hate ID!”

Then I thought of Dweck’s premise.  I started to think of my patients who see themselves decisively as non-exercisers.  Or who hate vegetables.  Or who say they are ‘all or nothing’ folks who simply cannot moderate their eating, alcohol intake, or anything else.  They say, “That’s just who/how I am/it is; nothing I can do.”  Until now I have accepted these self-assessments without question or challenge.

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And now I wonder:  If I allow for a different assessment of my relationship with infectious disease, how much better could I learn the material?  If I open my mind to the possibility that I could actually remember all those (damned) drug names and mechanisms, the myriad tick-born diseases and their cardinal symptoms, and all the rest, could I actually have fun?  And then, how much better could I teach it?

If we all saw in ourselves just a little more possibility, or redefined our attributes to allow for unrestricted growth and evolution, what more could we achieve?  How liberated could we feel to explore diverse aspects of our personalities?  What novel ideas could we exchange with others, to create and innovate around interpersonal, communal, and political life?

From now on I will recite a new mantra for the ID webinars:  “There’s a lot to learn here.  I can get better at this.  Bring it.”  Yup, feels good.  Hmmm, I wonder where else I could grow my mindset?