No Longer Stupid, Not Yet Infirm: Make Every Pull Count

Reflections on turning 52, yay!

I’ gotta say, I kinda killed it at the gym yesterday. It’s because Jacob was coaching, and because it was the third week of the block and I had avoided death the prior two Saturdays–that does wonders for confidence! Band rotations, bike, rope waves (I hate ropes), butterfly sit ups, mountain climbers, rower and SkiErg–woohooooo!

Remember when I wrote about how much I love driving curvy roads in the mountains? It’s the challenge of hugging that perfect tangent, timing the brake and acceleration just right–such a thrill! I feel the same way about rowing and skiing at the gym. Every pull on the machine is a chance to train that movement just a little better. What proportion of rowing power comes from hip and knee extension versus lat pull? When during the stroke is best to extend the back, if at all? How much hinge and knee flexion is optimal on that ski? If I practice this well and I ever get on The Price Is Right, will I have an advantage spinning that big wheel? We train functional movements, after all!

It’s a practice in presence. When I focus on each pull of the rower or SkiErg, I’m almost one with the machine, flowing in real time, in fluid motion. It borders on meditative, honestly. Each pull, each session feels a little more fluid, a little more powerful, efficient, and rewarding. Where else can I apply this mindset? On the slackboard. For two months now I have set the goal of spending five minutes each work day balancing on a two inch wide nylon strap that spans the length of a skateboard-shaped wooden plank. I’m already good on both long and round boards and a Bosu, but this is a whole new challenge. The asymmetry between left and right, which I sense only somewhat doing single leg movements in the gym, amplifies exponentially on the slack line. But in fifteen minutes or less per week, in eight weeks, I have made noticeable improvements in both physical balance and mental focus.

What fantastic opportunities, these training modalities, to continue growing body, mind, and spirit at this age! My nest is about to empty. I have things yet to do and plenty of runway still to do them, if I attend to what matters:

5 Domains: Sleep, Exercise, Nutrition, Stress Management, and Relationships.
3 Fundamental Skills: Self-Awareness, Self-Regulation, and Effective Communication.
5 Attributes of physical, mental, emotional, and relational fitness: Stable, Strong, Flexible, Agile, and Resilient.

Life is crazy fun when we keep learning and growing, making new friends, finding love and connection around every corner.

Love multiplies when offered, received, reflected, and amplified. I experience it every day and never take it for granted. There are also areas where I could love better; every day is another chance to practice that, too.

Who knows how long we each have on this earth, really? Regardless, I still think of every life as having infinite possibilities–HA! I wrote that post on my birthday three years ago! We just never know what encounters will change our lives for the better, set us on a path of even deeper, brighter, tighter, and more inclusive love. Even through pain and struggle, there can always be light on the other side.

No longer stupid, yes… Maybe for a decade or so now?
Not yet infirm, RAH! Not for many more years, if I can help it!

Make every pull, every encounter, every relationship, every expression, every breath count, my friends!

Bring What Ya Got. Wow, I wrote that one over ten years ago. I got the advice in 1987, and it’s just as relevant for me at 52 as it was at 14, maybe even more so, as what I’ ‘got’ right now is definitely not what I had then! OH that makes me laugh in so many different ways, it’s just too good.

Daughter and I hit the road tomorrow, friends. I’ gotta pack! I have an idea what I may write here next week, and it could all change multiple times between now and then–life! Onward in love, light, peace, and snacks!

Bit Post: Squishy and Strong

Last week’s last set: 10 reps, 130#

4 x 10: 95-125-135-145#
(last set actually x 11)

I PR’d my trap bar deadlift today, woohooooooo!! I can now reliably lift at least my own body weight, and it was not that hard!

I knew it was possible so I asked my friends to take a video– Thanks, Elle! The last PR was some weeks ago, 135#, 6 reps; I remember it feeling moderately difficult but not impossible, so I looked forward to this block to advance the weight. Today, in the third and final week of this program, I was confident. And I killed it, if I do say so myself (I even got in one extra rep at the end, having lost count and wanting to make sure I did all ten)! I feel strong!

The day unfolded one task after another, and I only saw the video hours later.
First thought: Look at all those cutaneous fat rolls, eew! Gymwear does not necessarily flatter the perimenopausal body, I say–especially when it was purchased a decade before said menopause began, HA!

But you know what? I’m okay with it. I have pulled and pushed more weight the past week–the past 20 months, actually–than I have in my entire life. I have made remarkable progress and learned so much about my body. I’ve had pain (my body ‘talking to me’, as Jacob says) in my left glute, right forearm, left knee, low back, and right shoulder. I can always modify a movement to protect a vulnerable spot while still strengthening it, thanks to my amazing coaches. Now I need to work on grip strength (hello dead hang, omg) so I can keep loading for more weight and reps, woohooooooooo!

So really, who cares if I’m a little squishy on the outside? I carry it well.

I am well on my way to being a Strong Old Lady. I feel great body, mind, and spirit, and that’s what matters. And I can shop for more flattering clothes if I want.

To my fellow old-ish ladies: Keep pushing. Find your people. Let your body surprise you with its capacity and resilience. Have fun!

Life is short and we are here to cheer one another on!

Squishy and Strong, my friends. It’s all good.

What Counts?

Tainan, Taiwan

On January 15 this year I posted about a new habit I had committed to establishing:

1. Upon waking, get sunlight for at least several minutes before getting on any screen
2. Delay caffeine intake for at least 45 minutes after waking

I also committed to writing Morning Pages (3 pages, long hand, stream of consciousness journaling) in those first 15-30 minutes, which was actually the primary goal. The point of the practice is to unlock clarity and creativity in those first minutes of waking, when the door between conscious and subconscious awareness and insight is more open than at other times of day. Today was Day 310 total (I miss a few days a month, on average). But it was delayed, so did it count?

I do three high intensity workouts at Ethos every week. It gets harder to motivate to do things at home anymore, and yesterday I felt sheepishly happy to Iog 20 minutes of moderate effort on the elliptical. That counts as exercise, in my opinion. But what if I had only walked to the grocery store and back (which I also did)? What intensity and duration justifies that green dot on my habit tracker?

What counts as meditation, prayer, or ‘low carb’?

Why does it matter?

How many times a day do we encounter one recommendation or another for how many steps we should take, how much protein to eat, what school of meditation is best, what sleep routines to adopt, and how many people we need in our inner circle? If we wanted to follow all of the ‘experts” advice for health, just reading the recommendations and attempting to execute would be a full time job.

Of course I get to decide what counts as Morning Pages or exercise or not, because I am only accountable to myself for the habits and behaviors that uphold my own health. In the end it’s about goals, trade-offs, and results. Why do I do these things? What am I trying to accomplish? What am I willing and not willing to do for the desired outcomes?

What works for me, regardless of what ‘experts’ say and ‘studies show’?

Morning pages make my day better whether I have looked out the window or at my phone beforehand, though the insights may come a bit easier with the former, because I always spend more time on the phone than I intend. But it still usually takes at least a page and a half before novel ideas and epiphanies emerge. Regardless, I feel calmer and centered having journaled at all before the day starts in earnest.

Moving in any way for any amount of time benefits both mind and body, and I can both feel and see consequences of variations in frequency, duration, and intensity over days, weeks, and months. If I move above and beyond activities of daily living and work, then I count it, track it, and review over time to correlate with how I feel.

I see people getting fixated on ‘what counts’. Our culture of metrics, trackers, comparison, and competition foster this tendency toward obsessiveness. It’s too easy today to lose the forest for the trees, and much too easy to forget that the complex global ecosystem of a whole person’s health is synergistic in multiple simultaneous dimensions rather than simple or linear in any way. Whenever we hear anyone say, ‘just do (xxx), and it will fix (some global problem that nobody has yet to solve because there is simply no one right solution),’ we should approach with high skepticism and alert critical thinking.

If it aligns with my commitments and gives me a sense of progress toward my goals, then I say it counts. Tracking helps me see patterns, intersections, and correlates. It makes me more self-aware in real time, holds me accountable, and gives me a little dopamine hit with each green dot logged. Counting can be its own reward.

In the end, however, it’s the being and the doing that matter. So count it or not, I get to choose. The rewards of action and results outweigh those of counting. I think it’s good once in a while to consider more deeply the basic questions like, “What counts?” It keeps me honest.